Penn Group

 15-year-old Miley Cyrus - also known as Hannah Montana, also known as Miley Stewart, also known as the inhuman force that keeps your daughter awake at night as she feverishly plots new ways to gain precious, precious tickets - has signed a seven-figure deal with the Disney Book Group for her memoirs.

Let me repeat: 15-year-old Miley has signed a book deal for her memoirs. Aside from the fact that her life story is short enough to fit inside of two pages, she’s at an age when most people are still struggling to learn the difference between a noun and an adjective. Logic would suggest that Ms. Cyrus is using a ghostwriter.

So, who is it? Although Hannah Montana’s substantial and rabid fan base must have played some part in attracting the substantial deal, and Ms. Cyrus’s long-standing relationship with Disney has probably done much to increase their confidence in her, publishers won’t put down this much money unless the writer is a seasoned pro.

I’ll put it on the line: if you know Cyrus’s ghostwriter - or if you are her ghostwriter - then call us. Now. We have a place for you at Penn Group.